Letterman's Open Season on Marv
November 13, 1997
David Letterman, who refrained from making jokes at Marv Albert's expense while he was on trial for assault, didn't hold back during the disgraced sportscaster's appearance Wednesday night on the Late Show. "Marv has not been on this show for some time, so it'll be interesting to find out what he's been up to," Letterman joked before Marv came onstage. When Albert sat down next to his longtime friend, the host mockingly asked, "Anything new with you?" Albert, who called his recent headline-grabbing troubles "a nightmare," conceded that he went through a "curious" period in his life. "When I get curious, I turn on the Discovery Channel," Letterman joked. "Maybe you should do the same thing." When Albert admitted that he had met a transvestite, Letterman replied, "I've known you for sixteen years. Never once did you say to me, 'Dave, guess who I met last night?'" Albert, who pled guilty to assault after a former girlfriend accused him of biting her and forcing her to perform oral sex, did not reveal anything new about the incident, and steered clear of questions about his sexual preferences. "I just had to ask you: Panties? Panties, Marv?" Letterman inquired. Albert retorted, "Can I ask you details about your sex life?" Letterman deadpanned, "The only thing I have ever bitten in my life during sex was my lower lip." Which is really more than we ever needed to know.